Food, Friends, and Olive Garden: @KeatonPatti  I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours  of Olive Garden commercials and then  asked it to write an Olive Gardern  commercial of its own. Here is the first  nadA  OLIVE GARDEN COMMERCIAL  FRIEND 3  Leave without me. I'm home.  INT. OLIVE GARDEN RESTAURANT  WAITRESS  A group of FRIENDS laughs at a dinner table. A WAITRESS comes  to deliver what could be considered food  Gluten Classico. From the kitchen  We the Gluten Classico. we believe the waitress that it ュ  from the kitchen. We have no reason not to believe  WAITRESS  Pasta nachos for you.  We see the pasta nachos. They're warm and defeated.  Friend 4 says nothing.  FRIEND 1  FRIEND 1  The menu is here.  What is wrong, Friend 4?  WAITRESS  Lasagna wings with extra Italy  Friend 4 says nothing.  FRIEND 2  We see the lasagna wings. There's more Italy than necessary  Friend 4, what is wrong, Friend 4?  FRIEND 2  I shall eat Italian citizens  Friend 4 smiles wide. Her mouth is full of secret soup  WAITRESS  ANNOUNCER  Unlimited stick.  (wet voice)  We see the unlimited stick. It is infinite. It is all.  Olive Garden. When You're Here,  You re Here meirl
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