With my good friend Pat, a former Army Ranger. This was the night before I made my first attempt at sobriety. The bar at the top of the W Hotel in Washington, DC overlooking the Treasury Building and the White House, January 31, 2012. The next day I would appear on Hardball with Chris Matthews on MSNBC afraid I would vomit on the set and desperate for an end to it all. Knowing hundreds of thousands of people were watching I decided I couldn't take my own life and going on as I was was just too painful. I'm still alive.
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